January 19, 2023
Berlin Inspirations: Vegan Currywurst Is Almost As Gross As the Real Thingby Randi / September 23, 2014
To kick off the next few posts dedicated to Philadelphia, I wanted to start with something I made as a challenge from my grandmother. She’s is a real Philadelphia eye-talian, and therefore she is the greatest cook. This summer, she told me how her mother (a Calabrese, from the toe of the boot) used to make polenta for breakfast in the most amazing way you’ve never considered: fried in maple syrup and butter and covered in powdered sugar. I mean, polenta is one of the most amazing foods ever, but as a sweet food? Incredible! I am not usually up for sweet foods for breakfast (unless we are splitting it ‘for the table’ and we all get savory items in addition, because that’s always a great plan and it’s how I suggest everybody do brunch from now on you’re welcome), but this is something I would happily wake up for. Well, I don’t happily wake up for anything but you get my point.
Polenta frying in pools of syrup
Grandmother said you have to use the polenta that comes in tubes for this (and nothing else!), so it holds its shape and sustains the flipping and the frying. There were no real measurements shared; you just add ‘enough’ of everything so it cooks up and tastes good. But I’ll share what worked for me below! I was very skeptical of turning one of my favorite dinner foods into a breakfast (or dessert; I actually made it for dessert) treat, but what a treat it was! You must try this! I think it’s so much better than French toast or something like that because it can’t get soggy and it’s actually good as leftovers. Also, this is the perfect sweet treat for ushering in the new year tonight on Rosh Hashanah! Add a few apple slices and it would be heaven!
FRIED SWEET POLENTA
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Ingredients:
Directions:
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 This is the kind of polenta you want. In a tube. It’s so beautiful. Naaaaaht.  Don’t overstuff your pan; you need spatula flipping room!  Fried sugarrrrrrrrrr  Bubbly fried sugarrrr |
Have you ever heard of something like this? Or tried it? Are you going to try it and tell me how delicious it is? I know I can’t wait to have it again. Let’s all thank my grandmother and Italians in general for their culinary wisdom. Happy new year!
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Tal Ronnen’s Crossroads: The Best Fancy Vegan Meal In L.A.
Going into dinner at Crossroads, my first ever meal in Los Angeles, I was wary. I knew of Tal Ronnen, famous celebrity chef behind Oprah’s 21-day vegan challenge and Ellen’s wedding, and I was super psyched to finally eat at his fancy well-known restaurant on Melrose (so I could say “We’re going to Melrose” in Ambular’s voice). But I had heard from several people whose opinions I trust, and none of them agreed on whether the food was disappointing or BRE (best restaurant ever). Either the consistency at Crossroads is just nonexistent or some of my friends have the Sookie-preggers-tastebud-crazytimes, but luckily I guess I went on a good night. No, a great night. A freaking fantastic, fabulous night because this dinner was off the chizzz, people, and despite an absolutely stellar week of eating in L.A. (which will be my next like bajillion posts), Crossroads was the highlight among all highlights.
Now, not everything was perfect. Far from it. The service was nicht so good; we will get to that later. Notably, the lighting was not good for pictures, as you will be able to clearly (or blurrily) see. This is really upsetting because the food is so beautifully plated, but I guess they’re of the old-school belief that food is for eating and not photographing. Amateurs. No it’s not a big deal just a warning so you don’t keep shouting ah my eyes! Also, I was seated so I faced the bar, and there was a semi-famous woman sitting directly in my line of vision and I couldn’t figure out who she was! So that was a bummer! I think some sort of Real Housewife or mob wife or some such person I should probably be glad I can’t name. The group at the table next to us had to have been some sort of band or something. One of the guys was a f-ing slob, wearing like dirty pajamas to this insanely nice restaurant, and he was hairier than if Rob Delaney got turned into a woolly mammoth. Like his hair and his beard were on the table. So gross. And another guy was a dead ringer for Noel Fielding, giant witch’s hat and all. They have to be famouses, right? Or is that just how regulars in L.A. are too?
But the food was epic. So epic that I place Crossroads in the Michelin series I write. No, it doesn’t have a star, but you know what? It was much better than some meals that had even multiple stars attached (and it was more expensive erma p gerd) so I’m tagging it as such. CHANGE APPROVED. Also, Husband and I went with two local friends, so it was one vegan and three omnivores. They were all blown away by every course. Like BUHH LOWN away. I was so happy just for that! Let’s get down to it.
But the food was epic. So epic that I place Crossroads in the Michelin series I write. No, it doesn’t have a star, but you know what? It was much better than some meals that had even multiple stars attached (and it was more expensive erma p gerd) so I’m tagging it as such. CHANGE APPROVED. Also, Husband and I went with two local friends, so it was one vegan and three omnivores. They were all blown away by every course. Like BUHH LOWN away. I was so happy just for that! Let’s get down to it.
Little ball of heaven in the back, some necessary greens on the left
The concept is small plates, tapas style, allegedly coming out as each was ready but we realized that the sequence was actually following the menu order, which made more sense than otherwise. The waitress recommended 4-5 dishes per person, and I think we did 3-4 each (all for sharing) and had trouble finishing the final dishes, so keep that in mind. We started with the Charred Ricotta, served with crostini and apricot thyme glaze. I was never a huge cheese person, like I never cried and pissed and moaned about having to give it up like other prospective vegans do at all times, but this new wave of artisan (meaningless) vegan cheese is extraordinary, and this dish was a prime example of it. I don’t know what it’s made of, but unlike the plain whipped tofu I’ve had at other places who call such an abomination ricotta, this was amazing. I wish I could have this dish delivered to my house every single day, but that would be supes gross after a 12 hour flight. And then customs and stuff? Ugh. I’d still eat it.
Our other small starter was the Watercress and Peach Salad, which was refreshing and must have been pretty good considering I don’t particularly like watercress and I had eaten the peach of my liiife the day before. Oh California produce. The salad was tossed with hazelnuts and a mint vinaigrette, which was happily not minty at all. Strong start.
Our other small starter was the Watercress and Peach Salad, which was refreshing and must have been pretty good considering I don’t particularly like watercress and I had eaten the peach of my liiife the day before. Oh California produce. The salad was tossed with hazelnuts and a mint vinaigrette, which was happily not minty at all. Strong start.
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I can’t get over how blurry these pics are! This salad is total Blursula! Blahhh. But it was so good. And the ricotta oh man. It had like a protective shell and when you broke through it you were rewarded with the best cheese ever. |
Amazingness
Next up was probably my favorite part of the entire dinner, and I think the dish that most impressed by friends. The Artichoke Oysters were served and eaten like oysters, with the little ball of artichoke puree, yellow tomato bearnaise, and kelp caviar over a grilled oyster mushroom and served on a meaty piece of artichoke heart. Oh my goodness, this is the most impressive thing I’ve eaten in a while. Just the sheer creativity of making something like that, and the genius in executing it perfectly, boggles the mind. I’m just obsessed! In the middle was a scoop of seaweed, my favorite thing, but I didn’t realize it until someone else ate it. And I didn’t even care! That’s how good these oysters were. Holy crap. Next time some asshat tries to have an argument about the whole ‘can’t vegans eat oysters they’re plants right?’ just be like why would you eat enlarged bougers when you could eat artichoke oysters?
the rancho carne toros
You’d think maybe after the life-changing events of the ricotta and the oysters, that the 300 subsequent dishes would be slightly disappointing, but you’d be mistaken. Everything was on such a high level, it felt almost criminal to be enjoying it without being Ellen myself. We tried another salad next, the Grilled Romaine, and although it was very difficult to share (being a wedge salad), it was my favorite salad. The grilled lettuce heart was smothered in harissa ranch dressing. I’m not a fan of ranch dressing, never was, even though I went to a college where people put that shit on their pizza. But this ranch dressing in this salad? I’m a convert. Well at least to Crossroads’ ranch. The salad was topped with pickled shallots, heirloom cherry tomatoes, and black olives, all of which nicely cut the heaviness of hot lettuce and ranch dressing. Such a wonderful combination!
Such a good dish for sharing, unless you are eating with me, because I will eat all the damn bread.
Speaking of pizza, the pizza section on the Crossroads menu was really difficult to pass up, but we had a feeling that their fancier-seeming dishes were the heavy-hitters, and we were right. Next we had the basic but delicious Lentil Flatbread, a wonderfully earthy and warm pita-like bread served with little dishes of marinated eggplant, braised banana pepper, and mushroom relish. I honestly couldn’t tell which vegetable was in which pot (I mean by color sure but you know what i mean), but it was all great.
could eat 100
The “Crab Cakes” (their quotes, not mine) were equally good while being a more familiar taste at similarly adventurous vegan restaurants. They were topped with the daintiest amount of tartar sauce and watercress. While the cake itself was really fantastic (I’m guessing hearts of palm? but it doesn’t say in the menu), it needed a lot more of the sauce. I guess we could have asked for some but they’re small bites so you don’t really realize it until after you’ve finished.
We also probably wouldn’t have asked because our initially-fine waitress became the Mona-Lisa-Saperstein WORRRRRRST seriously the worst. At one point, she tried to remove my friend’s wine glass, even though it still had a few sips in in. My friend said she wasn’t done with that yet, and the waitress put it down. But I guess she had been worn down by a terrible audition earlier in the day (probs all actors right?) and so this benign comment instead hit her as criticism of her performance in her day job and at the thought of her being a failure at that too she absolutely shattered, and was a total b word to us the rest of the time. I mean that’s just me guessing but I’m probably right. She rushed us from then on, couldn’t wait to get rid of us so would idle nearby waiting for us to finish a plate so she could quickly snatch it away. Like this was a busy restaurant with lots to do, but she would just watch us, ignoring her other tables, and look perturbed. What a terribleness.
hidden not-really-a-joke was because of ray romano you get it
Luckily, her inability to keep it together did not affect our enjoyment of our meal. No, we’re not done. Next was Grilled Romano Beans, which I’ve never heard of before but everybody likes them right so we ordered them. They were really good, still in their pods and barbecued with balsamic peaches, marcona almonds (those are the fancy almonds right), and black garlic chili vinaigrette. So damn good! That’s a lot of flavors going on but beans are pretty basic on their own so it was all working.
Next was a dish I know all my friends in England are throwing tomatoes at their screens over – the Grilled Fresh Baby Corn. People here just don’t do baby corn, what I can tell you? I can take it or leave it but this dish? I’ll take. I bet it could even turn the naysayers onto baby corn, it was RG. Harissa-spiced, mixed with crispy shallots and corn puree, this dish was so worth ordering, even though when my friend first ordered it I was like “you’re wasting a space on baby corn? why would you waste a space on baby corn?” but it was a good decision.
Our first of the Comforting Classics, as they’re called, was the dish most recommended to me – the Chickpea Cake. It’s a good deal heartier than the smaller plates, and so actually makes this very expensive food seem like a better value. The chickpea patty is served with porcini mushrooms, red spring onions, and sherry demi cream. I don’t know what makes cream ‘demi’ but I really enjoyed the chickpea cake and was glad I followed everyone’s advice. It seems like an entree you’d get at a nice comforting vegan restaurant, or maybe make yourself if you have a lot of time one night. Very solid and delicious.
Onto the last of our Comforting Classics, and the last of our savory dishes (I totally forgot to take pictures of some things in the ruckus of this amazing meal! sorry not sorry! Add like 4-5 other dishes and you’ll get a sense of how much food we ate!). The Scaloppini Milanese was so amazing. It could have easily been a hunk of Gardein or something at a lesser restaurant, but this patty, whatever it was, was incredible, with the perfect texture. The telltale syruppy but thin Milanese sauce took it to the next level, and like everything else here, was wonderful.
On to dessert!!! We were so full that we couldn’t even finish some of the above dishes, but we had to get dessert. I was actually in a place that would give me something other that fruit sorbet and fruit; of course I’m getting dessert! We decided to split two among the four of us, starting with the Peach Upside Down Cake. Proving that their pastry chef is as talented as the head chef, this wonderful cake was warm and full of deep brown sugar. The roasted peaches were just as good as all the other peaches we ate all night and all week (the best peaches in this state!) and complemented by the lemon cornmeal of the cake. The best part was the brown sugar ice cream it was served with, not that it was better than the cake but just because ice cream is my favorite. As such, the dessert I got to choose was the famous Hot Fudge Sundae, which yeah I could make and yeah I could have elsewhere but shush, it was awesome. The vanilla bean ice cream was served on top of a warm brownie (le sigh), mixed with banana fudge, whatever that amazingness is, and topped with hazelnuts and coconut whipped cream. Best sundae ever, yes.
Cake & ice cream! |
Ice cream sundaeee! |
Overall, this was an epic, spectacular meal, definitely one of my favorites ever. It was stupid expensive, but compared to similar restaurants, I think the value was so high that it was well worth it.
Crossroads, Los Angeles, California, US&A
Water speed: Decent. There were a few times when we had to flag people down, but overall it was okay.
Service: What a weird issue! The waitress was a total eggshell plaintiff or something. She just didn’t like us and make it hella obvious. Boo urns.
Bathrooms: I felt like I was in an episode of Gossip Girl when I went to the bathroom. They are small, with two stalls separated by the sink area, and blonde wannabe starlets apparently congregate in the sink area to fix their hair while I try to wash my hands. Their conversation was so hilariously stereotypical of everything L.A. I almost thought it was Improv Everywhere or something.
Food: Incredible! Not one bad note. One of the best meals ever.
Bonus: The atmosphere can’t help but be great, considering the location and the notoriety. Usually more famous people are there than were on my night, but even so, the food is so superb that I didn’t even care that it was apparently the one night of the year that Russell Simmons wasn’t there.
Happy Thanksgiving! Vegan Recipes and a Full How-To Guide…Sort of
Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!
Even though my last name rhymes with Pilgrim, Thanksgiving was never my favorite holiday. I hate how people focus on the actual turkey, on all the death and suffering masquerading as the central food and important ‘tradition’, rather than making it just about being with people you love. (Or despise.) But I loved being with my family and playing games and laughing a lot. And of course sneaking vegan sides and desserts into the mix! This year, I’m not with my family. I’m not even in America for chrissakes! But we’re still celebrating Thanksgiving. I miss not having lots of people around, but I do get to have my first entirely vegan Thanksgiving dinner! Yay!!
Even though my last name rhymes with Pilgrim, Thanksgiving was never my favorite holiday. I hate how people focus on the actual turkey, on all the death and suffering masquerading as the central food and important ‘tradition’, rather than making it just about being with people you love. (Or despise.) But I loved being with my family and playing games and laughing a lot. And of course sneaking vegan sides and desserts into the mix! This year, I’m not with my family. I’m not even in America for chrissakes! But we’re still celebrating Thanksgiving. I miss not having lots of people around, but I do get to have my first entirely vegan Thanksgiving dinner! Yay!!
Apparently the Brits are willing to make me smile today, because not only are the Thanksgiving episodes of “How I Met Your Mother” playing on TV, but the commercials they just ran during them showed Philly City Hall AND the American show “Paternity Court”! The caption said “You’re the father” and the guy just FAINTED flat out! It was the best thing.
Anyway, I made tons of food over the past few days, mostly things I’ve never made before. Thanksgiving is about tradition and making the same stuff every year? F that! This is your chance to be a vegan chef all-star and show off. Okay you can do that with the same old favorites I guess. I’m sorry, ‘favourites’.
First, the most important thing to decide is what you’ll be having for dessert. Then work up the rest of the meal from there! It’s like how people choose their shoes first and then plan the rest of their outfit. (Does anybody actually do that?) You’ll have to make it to the end of this post to see our treasure treats.
Anyway, I made tons of food over the past few days, mostly things I’ve never made before. Thanksgiving is about tradition and making the same stuff every year? F that! This is your chance to be a vegan chef all-star and show off. Okay you can do that with the same old favorites I guess. I’m sorry, ‘favourites’.
First, the most important thing to decide is what you’ll be having for dessert. Then work up the rest of the meal from there! It’s like how people choose their shoes first and then plan the rest of their outfit. (Does anybody actually do that?) You’ll have to make it to the end of this post to see our treasure treats.
Or I guess I’ll just share the picture now.
Next, you want to check off the important sides. Do you want mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes, stuffing? All three? I would have made all three if it wasn’t going to just be my husband and me for dinner. I decided on mashed potatoes, garlicked.
Do you want to eat greens this year? I did, so I roasted some Brussels sprouts in olive oil and pink salt. The best is that there were literally 8 sprouts in the package I bought. It’s like the most paltry showing of vegetables at any meal ever.
Good evening, TWO Brussels sprouts
Which gravy will you make? Is it a mushroom-based gravy? Is it from a recipe or something you wing? For me, it’s the Punk Rock Chickpea Gravy from “Vegan with a Vengeance”, with extra soy and nooch, and with butterbeans because the chickpeas in England DO NOT MASH. I tried mashing chickpeas here and the little f-ers evaded the pressure Every. Single. Time. Then I tried just squeezing them to death with my hands and they POPPED OUT ACROSS THE ROOM. And I am pretty strong. I just…the chickpeas here are possessed.
More sides more sides! If I had my druthers I would probably say druthers more and then have made some kind of kale thing. But luckily, Husband requested the green bean casserole of his younger days. Now, I realize that so many of you have had green bean casserole at every single Thanksgiving dinner with your families. It’s like a huge thing right? I never even heard of it until Isa posted a recipe on the PPK a few years ago. I know! But Husband’s family always had it so I had to make it even though green beans roasted in mushroom soup sounds revolting. I planned on using Isa’s recipe but couldn’t find vegan mushroom soup for the life of me, so my friend Elli (who is too cool for blogging) helped me out. Recipe below!! And guess what….it’s freaking AMAZING. Convert over here.
Then, what’s your main?! Will you make the famous chickpea cutlets? (Yes.) Or did you buy a Tofurky roast in America where it costs like $8 and not like here where the high street Whole Foods sells them for THIRTY FREAKING POUNDS?? (That is about $100 dollars.) Even if you gave me the money for that, I could not stomach buying it for that price. Even if Donald Trump himself was like, I’m kind of an ass, but here’s a million dollars; you must spend it on overpriced Tofurky. Okay maybe then I would. Unless the money smelled like cheese.
And then make cranberry sauce. No one eats it, right, but if it’s not there it pisses off Santa or something. Also, making it from scratch makes all your pots and stirrer majiggies a beautiful deep pink through the next few uses.
OH OH and biscuits!! You can make pumpkin biscuits if you want. I guess that would make sense. But this year I veganized Alton Brown’s perfect regular southern biscuit recipe and they are delicious. Recipe below!
So if you followed my instructions? guidelines? stream-of-consciousness blogging style that we all have learned to love/deal with? you now have a killer menu that would impress even the pickiest omnivore on this oh so special American day! This was my menu. I made all of it from scratch!! So proud!
- Perfect Southern biscuits (recipe below!)
- Roasted Brussels sprouts
- Cranberry sauce (recipe below!)
- Punk Rock chickpea gravy from Vegan with a Vengeance
- Isa’s chickpea seitan cutlets
- Traditional green bean casserole (recipe below!)
- Mashed potatoes (recipe below!)
- Pumpkin cheesecake from Vegan Pie In The Sky
- Brownie bottom peanut butter fudge pie (I’ll share a recipe another day if people ask for it)
GREEN BEAN CASSEROLE
I had no idea about this so-called traditional Thanks day dish until after I went vegan! Crazy! I was going to make the PPK version, but I couldn’t find vegan cream of mushroom soup. So my vegan food guru Elli (@catsxdogs on instagram) told me how to make a delicious version without store-bought soup! Yay!
Ingredients:
Ingredients:
- 400g green beans (That’s just what it said on the package! I don’t even know what 400g translates to in America talk! I’ve been here too long already! Okay I googled it and it’s like 14 oz. That doesn’t help me at all. Use like a pound.)
- olive oil
- 1 small onion, diced
- 3 cloves garlic, minced
- 1 pound basic white mushrooms, sliced
- 1 teaspoon salt
- fresh ground black pepper to taste
- ¼ cup white flour
- 2 tablespoons vegan butter
- 2 very strong bouillon cubes (I used one liquidy pot kind and one organic powdery kind. Diversity!)
- 2 cups plain unsweetened almond milk
- 2 cups crispy fried onions (storebought, don’t make these yourself you crazy animal)
Directions:
- Clean, trim, and chop your green beans.
- Boil them in salted water for 7 minutes. Drain and leave in colander for some minutes.
- In a large saucepan, sauté the onion and garlic in a bit of olive oil for about 6 minutes over medium heat.
- Add the mushrooms, salt, and pepper, and cook down. Stir to avoid burning.
- Add the flour and butter and cook for another minute.
- Add the bouillon cubes and plain almond milk and stir stir stir!
- Cook, stirring, until thickened.
- Remove from heat and mix in green beans.
- Mix one cup of your fried onions into the whole shebang.
- *NB: If you are making this ahead of time, stop here, cover with tin foil, and refrigerate until ready to bake.
- Preheat oven to 425F.
- Spread the whole mix into a casserole pan at least 1 inch deep.
- Spread the rest of your fried onions over the top of the casserole.
- Bake for 20 minutes. Cover lightly with tin foil if you fear your onions will burn.
- Say ta dah!
MASHED POTATOES
Not so much a recipe as a reminder. You prob know what to do but here’s what I did!
Ingredients:
Ingredients:
- 2 pounds small potatoes (not like ‘hey that’s just small potatoes’, but actual small potatoes.)
- 1/3 cup vegan butter (you may say that’s a lot but I’m a dreamer/it’s Thanksgiving!)
- 1/2 cup unsweetened plain soy milk
- 1/2 teaspoon garlic granules
Directions:
- Boil the potatoes in a big pot of salted water. I let them go for about 20 minutes just to be sure.
- Drain but keep the potatoes in the pot.
- Add the rest of the ingredients.
- Mash it with a masher until desired consistency. I used a masher for the first time today and it was SO fun. Much better than using an immersion blender.
- Say ta dah!
CRANBERRY SAUCE
so fancy
I could only find frozen cranberries, so if you are using fresh, you probably have to add a bit more water to adjust for the ice melt. Or, if you are in America, your cranberry bag probably has a/this recipe!
Ingredients:
Ingredients:
- 1 pound cranberries
- ½ cup sugar
- 1 cup water
Directions:
- Mix the water and sugar in a big pot.
- Add the cranberries.
- Boil!
- Boil and stir!
- Are the cranberries popping open?
- Keep stirring as it boils!
- Is it getting thick?
- Do this for like 10 minutes then let it sit for 15 or till cool.
PERFECT SOUTHERN BISCUITS
Biscuits, man! Ughhh so good!
Ingredients:
- 2 cups all-purpose flour
- 1 tablespoon baking powder
- ½ teaspoon baking soda
- 1 teaspoon salt
- ¼ cup vegan butter (boy I wish they sold Earth Balance here)
- 1 cup unsweetened plain soy milk
- 2 teaspoons apple cider vinegar
Directions:
- Preheat oven to 425F.
- Add the milk and vinegar in a measuring cup. Put it in the fridge!
- Mix the dry ingredients in a mixing bowl.
- Add the butter with your fingers or a pastry cutter. I have a pastry cutter and I thought it was the bee’s knees but lately I’ve been using my fingers. Weird.
- Get the curdly milk out from the fridge and pour it in the bowl.
- Mix ever so gently, super gently, to get all the flour mixed in.
- Don’t overwork the dough. The Alton directions say to knead and roll out and cut into circles, but this was the stickiest dough I’ve ever come across, so I made drop biscuits.
- Drop ½ cup size spoonfuls on a parchment lined baking sheet.
- Bake for 16 minutes.
- Say ta dah!
Finish it off with at least one pie per person and you are a golden vegan!
Definitely make the Pumpkin Cheesecake. It’s so good, especially with a Speculoos cookie crust! Here is the recipe. I never do the pecan topping because who needs it? Also, I like seeing the swirl!
Definitely make the Pumpkin Cheesecake. It’s so good, especially with a Speculoos cookie crust! Here is the recipe. I never do the pecan topping because who needs it? Also, I like seeing the swirl!
I also made a Brownie Bottom Peanut Butter Fudge pie!
I hope your Thanksgiving was wonderful! It’s so nice to have a completely vegan holiday. I can’t wait until the next one! I guess that’s Christmas. I guess I have to make two pies per person for that one. Because of Jesus.
We barely made a dent, haha. Come over for leftovers! Also husband got me flowers! So nice!
